What I wish I had known: Allergies

Navigating Cow’s Milk Protein Allergy (CMPA) with a newborn

Why would someone choose oat milk, plant-based cheese, or soya yoghurt? Why would anyone want to be dairy-free? I used to ask those questions all the time. As a farmer’s daughter — and until 2006, a dairy farmer’s daughter — I grew up drinking milk straight from the cow. I couldn’t understand why anyone would willingly remove dairy from their diet.

Fast forward to March 2024, and I was about to learn that for many people, dairy-free isn’t a choice at all. It’s a necessity.

When you decide to start a family, people offer endless advice: breastfeeding, bottles, swaddles, prams… but no one ever mentions allergies. No one talks about cow’s milk protein allergy. No one hints at how hard it can be to navigate something like this with a newborn. I wish they had.

My son was born in the middle of lambing season — the busiest time of year on the farm. My family were all in their own (agricultural) delivery suites, so support looked like food parcels rather than extra hands. We were grateful, but we were also trying to find our feet with our new little boy.

“The first couple of weeks were the usual rollercoaster of newborn life: learning his cries, adjusting to nappies, soaking up the slow, sleepy days. But then things started to change.”

A rash appeared on his neck and face. His skin became dry and flaky. “Baby acne,” I was told. But it always seemed worse after a feed. Then came the suggestion of eczema. Creams didn’t help.

He became increasingly unsettled after feeding — and by unsettled, I mean screaming until he turned purple, his tiny body tensing into a ball, legs pulled tight to his chest. “All babies have their moments,” I was told. But this wasn’t a moment. This was every feed.

He was congested. He had reflux. He wouldn’t sleep unless he was upright on my chest. His nappies leaked constantly. Something wasn’t right.

I kept calling. I kept going back. Each time I was dismissed as an over-anxious first-time mum.

I had never heard of cow’s milk protein allergy. I didn’t know anyone with it. But every late-night Google search pointed me in that direction. I felt certain this was the cause — yet no one listened. I was repeatedly turned away with a different cream, Gaviscon, Infacol, the list goes on.

Months later, I broke. I cried in front of my health visitor, and finally someone heard me. Finally someone agreed this wasn’t normal.

We were prescribed a hydrolysed formula — the proteins broken down to be easier on his gut. It helped, but not enough. Many symptoms persisted.

Four long months after he was born, we were finally given an amino acid formula — completely free from cow’s milk proteins.

“Everything changed.

His skin healed. He gained weight. The congestion eased. He slept independently. The screaming stopped.

And at last, we could breathe. We could enjoy our happy, content little boy.”

Becoming a CMPA parent changed everything I thought I knew about babies and what it means to trust your instincts. It taught me how easily symptoms can be dismissed, how overwhelming the search for answers can feel, and how isolating those early months can be when no one seems to hear you.

If you’re reading this and recognising parts of your own story — the crying, the rashes, the reflux, the restless days and sleepless nights, the doubt, the feeling of not being believed — please know you’re not alone, there is light at the end of a tunnel and a baby who can settle to sleep. You deserve support, clarity, and someone who understands what you’re going through.

That’s why I now help other parents navigating CMPA, unsettled babies and sleep issues. If you’d like a calm, gentle space to talk things through, ask questions, or explore what might be going on for your little one, you’re welcome to book a free 15-minute discovery call with me here.

You don’t have to figure this out on your own.